Diving In

It’s funny how there comes a point in my brain, in my process, where everything just clicks and I’m ready to get on with the writing. I can’t even clearly say why it’s happened this time. A few friends have been nudging me, agreeing with the “just tell the story and don’t worry about the other stuff,” and that’s definitely helped. Kind of like I have…validation, perhaps. Not all stories require this level of internal debate. And I think I’ve finally narrowed down why, exactly, I’m dragging my feet on starting this new story.

The answer is really threefold.

The first is all me. I’m really enjoying listening to audiobooks and knitting right now. So my free time has been spent doing that, and I’m loving it. I find it relaxing and rewarding. And I haven’t been quite ready to cut into that time yet.

Second thing is that I read a lot. And reading is a vital part of my writing process. I’m not quite sure how I can explain it so that it makes sense to you, but for me, when I don’t read, my imagination lags, and I don’t feel as motivated to write. But of late…let’s just say that what I’ve read has been less than stellar. And there have been some that have been really good. But the lackluster showing has…dampened my enthusiasm some. I recently saw it described as refilling the well, and that resonated with me, as my well is nearly empty.

And then there’s just me, my personality. I worry incessantly about ridiculous things. It’s just who I am. I fret. I second guess. I overthink and over analyze.

But good news is, I’ve gotten over the hump. With the kind nudging, I’ve gotten my head into a good place. And that’s the first, most important step toward getting this story on the page. That last thing? Well, there’s nothing to do about that except shove it aside for as long as I can. And the kind nudging and the validation certainly helps keep that at bay.  Now that’s accomplished, I can deal with the other two things. The first is easy enough: I work really well on a reward system. An “if I do X then I can do Y” kind of thing. Using the knitting and audiobooks as a reward if I write a certain number of words or for a certain length of time means I can have both. The second is actually easy to handle as well: go back to some old favorites. Read something I haven’t in a while that I love, and that will help to fill the well.

With those three things handled, I can finally dive in. I’m on the edge of the spring board, and I’m read to jump. I just have to get the right kind of bounce going. Watch the word meter over the coming week, I expect it to go up by thousands.