Jack and Ryan will be back next week to share with us what they got each other for Christmas. Until then, enjoy this short about some of the perils of home renovation.
“I can’t get it up!”
The twelve year old boy in me couldn’t help but laugh at that. I bit my lip to keep it inside. If he caught me laughing, he’d be pissed.
“I’m a man!” he shouted, indignant. “I should be able to get this thing up!”
I pressed my knuckles against my mouth and turned my back to him. I would not laugh out loud. I wouldn’t.
“Oh, there it goes. No! Stop! You’re supposed to stay up. Once you go up, you stay up. That’s what you do!”
I lost it. The laugh burst from my throat like a mighty guffaw. I had to press my hand against my side, I was laughing so hard. It really shouldn’t be that funny. But he was so put out and had no idea what he said. Little boy humor still got to me, still made me laugh despite the fact that I should have outgrown it twenty years ago.
“Oh my God! What is wrong with you? This isn’t funny in the slightest. The window doesn’t work.”
“Counter-“snort ”-weight’s-“ chuckle “-broken,” I managed to choke out.
He huffed and stamped his foot before he crossed the room to my side. I reached out and pulled him in, but he kept his body stiff. I tried to rein in my mirth for his sake.
“Remind me again why we bought this house?” he grumbled.
“You wanted it, so we bought it. Because you said it was, and I quote, ‘too freaking cute.’”
“Well, it is that,” he mumbled, his body finally melting against mine. I dropped a kiss on his head and he grunted. “But it’s also a freaking money pit. Knob and tube wiring, so all the electrical has to be replaced. Poor insulation and crumbling sheetrock in practically every room. The stairs creak. The windows don’t open, or if they do, they don’t stay open. The furnace is so old it barely heats the house.”
Everything he said was true. But that didn’t mean that we should give up. This was his dream home, he was just too upset at the moment to remember. I’d just have to remind him.
“On the upside, it’s got copper pipes. The plumbing is solid.”
He was silent for a moment, then reluctantly agreed. “That’s true.”
“And all the beautiful hard wood floors?”
“After we refinish them, you mean.”
“Easy enough, though. And hey, there’s the breakfast nook.”
“Which is just so damn adorable I can’t even stand it.” He was trying to hold on to his annoyance but it was slipping fast.
“And what about the window seat in the bay window in the front room?”
He sighed and sagged against me, letting me take his weight because he knew I’d hold him up. “I love the window seat.”
I put both my arms around him and hugged him tight. Five years we’d been together and I still got a tiny thrill every time I realized how perfectly he fit in my arms.
“It’s going to be perfect once we get all the reno done. It’ll take a bit, but we’ll get it finished. Of course, if you don’t love it, then we can always flip it and buy something else.”
He jerked back, that indignation back in his eyes. “Are you kidding? This is our home! We aren’t selling!”
I smirked and he groaned. I saw the blush creeping up his cheeks before he buried his face in my chest. I chuckled and squeezed him tight.
“Okay, fine,” he muttered, his voice muffled. “You made your point.”
“Back to the list of what needs to be done then?” I asked. I didn’t bother to gloat. It would do me no good and he was reminded that we had bought this house to build our life together.
He took a deep breath, kissed me once, and then stepped out of my embrace. “Yes. But we’re replacing all the windows.”